Apart from my book, "Keep Squeaking Through" this site will eventually allow you to order your own customized Mortimer merchandise. Your favourite maxims, and illustrations, on a T-shirt, poster, stationery, mug, keyring and all that kind of stuff. And I'm thinking of offering the special fragrance which my cousin Terence Ratagain left to me with his beautiful Turkestan silk dressing gown, in which he composed his famous plays, Desperate Sables, The Winslow Vole and The Deep Blue Cheese.
The fragrance is mainly sandalwood with elusive notes of bergamot. Richard, my editor, thinks that Musk would be a better fragrance for a mouse to promote. But people might think it came from that person who stole my name and made such a hash(tag) of Twitter. Maybe I could call my fragrance Musquerade. Oh, and would you buy the sunglasses?
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